One Final Wish Delivered

When we moved into our house in November 2016, this was Larry's recliner in our living room. 

As his health declined, he experienced difficulty in getting out of his recliner. We were given the gift of this power recliner by our dear friends, the Johnsons. In the photo below you can see Larry seated in his new favorite chair.

The recliner that had been Larry's became mine as he adjusted to his new "electric chair", as I called it. 

One of the instructions Larry gave me 4 days before his passing was to give this power recliner to someone who could use it in our church congregation. 

Earlier this week that wish was fulfilled as the recliner was given to a Smith family, friends of ours from Church. Mrs. Smith sat in front of us nearly every Sunday for 22 years. Now she can sit in Larry's chair. I know he's happy about this!

In its place is "my" recliner that I sat in for the 20 years we lived in our previous house. Actually, the chairs have switched places from the way they were arranged in the second photo above when we first moved into this house. 

When my son helped move the rocker/recliner into its new location, he saw me take a picture of it and he asked "Is this going to be another blog post, Mom?" Yes, it surely is, Matt! 

My husband's grave one year later

To publicly acknowledge Larry's passing on November 13, 2018, I placed this "bough basket" on his grave Wed, Nov 13, 2019.

It featured a small stuffed bird that my friend placed in the bird feeder that was gifted to his gravesite by his daughter Ruthie Brady. The bird feeder is especially meaningful because it's made from a 1950 license plate from Pennsylvania, which was Larry's home state of birth. And it's significant because it was Larry's daily habit to feed the birds in our back yard. He loved to care for them.

The beautiful Christmas solar candles were placed at her father's grave by Ruthie Brady, accompanied by her husband, Brandon Brady, who was very devoted to his father-in-law Larry Jamison.

Thank you, Ruthie and Brandon, for your continuous attention to the final resting place of your devoted father and my loving husband!

Happy 73rd Birthday

The last birthday we were able to celebrate with Larry was his 72nd. His children joined us for dinner at The Village Inn. 

 Larry and Becky Jamison

 Larry Jamison and daughter Ruthie Jamison Brady

 Larry and daughter Rachael Jamison

 Larry and granddaughters Emily and Olivia Brady

 Larry and future daughter-in-law Mindy Dow

Larry with son Jeremy and son-in-law Brandon Brady.

The most memorable birthday Larry celebrated was Oct. 11, 1996 as his family and friends gathered in our home. His best friend at the time was Jennifer Jordan and she gifted him with 50 gifts since it was his 50th birthday party.

Your loving family wishes you a Happy 73rd Birthday this year, Larry.

The Laptop's gone, but the contents bless me

This week it came to my attention that my friend Dhiana needed a computer. Since Larry's Toshiba laptop was still in my possession, but not being used, I gladly offered it to Dhiana. I worked 3 hours Monday evening transferring all the documents and photos to the Western Digital Passport portable hard drive, pictured above. The laptop had Windows 10 on it, as well as Microsoft Office. 

Today I received this email from Dhiana: "Loving my computer! I love the keyboard. It's like playing the piano for me. Thank you so much, my friend!"

I'm happy that Dhiana has the computer and even happier that I still have possession of all of Larry's files. Now to find the time to sort and organize them. That will take me weeks! But it will help me feel like I'm interacting with my husband, as his personality is so evident in the things he saved and the way he chose to store them on his computer. I look forward to spending the time with him!!!

We Fell in Love on the Dance Floor

One of my favorite love songs is "Could I Have This Dance?" by Anne Murray. It has such special meaning to me, and here's why. 

I met Larry Jamison as we attended a local Divorce Support Group in July, 1991. I'd been divorced 18 months and had attended it through the year of 1990. In July of '91, I decided to go to the meetings again, as they were studying a new book on the subject of becoming a healthy "Single" and I knew I'd feel "safe" socializing among the attendees. Attending that night for the first time was Larry, as he'd been recently divorced. One of the activities encouraged by the hosts of the group was to attend a "Divorce Recovery Workshop" sponsored by First Presbyterian Church in Colorado Springs. Many of the members of our local group attended the 7-week workshop. We became good friends with many good people, with whom we'd socialize after the meetings.

One very special evening several of us attended a local establishment in Colorado Springs, Larry's recent hometown, for refreshments and fun. Dancing was available and Larry asked me to dance to my all-time favorite "Unchained Melody", described in this way in Wikipedia: "Of the hundreds of recordings made, the Righteous Brothers' version in July 1965, with a solo by Bobby Hatfield, became the jukebox standard for the late 20th century. Hatfield changed the melody and many subsequent covers of the song are based on his version. The Righteous Brothers recording achieved a second round of great popularity when featured in the film Ghost in 1990. In 2004, it was Number 27 on AFI's 100 Years...100 Songs survey of top tunes in American cinema."

Well, it was while dancing to that love song that evening that I fell in love with Larry Jamison. Larry had been taught to do ballroom dancing by his mother while he was still a pre-teen. His father was an Air Force Officer so the family attended many social functions in Officers Clubs around the world. I had learned to do ballroom dancing through my Junior High and High School school years while enrolled in the Arthur Murray Ballroom Dance classes taught by Hazel (Mrs. Herb) Smith in Great Bend, KS. However, it was not necessary to know formal dance steps as Larry took me in his arms (for the first time) and shared his rhythm and emotion on the dance floor that October in 1991. 
Soon, Anne Murray's hit "Could I Have This Dance" became my second favorite love song because the words were so applicable to my sentiment. 

Wikipedia provides this information about this song: ""Could I Have This Dance" is a song recorded by Canadian country music artist Anne Murray. "Could I Have This Dance" was featured in the 1980 film Urban Cowboy and appeared on both the soundtrack album for that film, as well as on Murray's Greatest Hits compilation, issued in late 1980. It was released in August 1980 and became Anne Murray's fifth number one country hit as a solo artist. The single went to number one for one week and spent a total of ten weeks on the country chart."Could I Have This Dance" was also Anne Murray's tenth Top 40 on the U.S. pop singles chart, hit peaking at number thirty-three.The song was written by Wayland Holyfield and Bob House."

Could I Have This Dance

Anne Murray, Amy Grant

I'll always remember the song they were playin'
The first time we danced and I knew
As we swayed to the music and held to each other
I fell in love with you

Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?
Would you be my partner every night?
When we're together it feels so right
Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?

I'll always remember that magic moment
When I held you close to me
As we moved together, I knew forever
You're all I'll ever need

Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?
Would you be my partner every night?
When we're together it feels so right
Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?

Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?
Would you be my partner every night?
When we're together it feels so right
Could I have this dance for the rest of my life?

Now that Larry is gone from this earthly life, I would add this final verse:
I had this dance for the rest of your life,
You were my partner every night.
When we were together, it felt so right,
I had this dance for the rest of your life.  

Here are just a couple occasions of Larry and I dancing together.

Larry & I dressed appropriately for "Prom Night" at Hot August Nights in Reno, NV in 1999.

Larry & I danced at the wedding dance of Ruth Jamison and Brandon Brady in 2003.

Yes, Larry Jamison, my Love, 
I'll always remember the song they were playin'
The first time we danced and I knew
As we swayed to the music and held to each other
I fell in love with you

Ruthie's Eulogy about her Dad

Dec 3, 2018 Funeral of Larry C. Jamison 

Hello everyone. My name is Ruthie and I'm the youngest of Larry's 6 children. As I stand here I see friends and relatives who have come a great distance to be here for my Dad. I am humbled at how he must have touched your lives.

I could speak today on all of the amazing accomplishments and things that my Dad has done (he was a man who wore MANY hats) but the one that I hold dearest to my heart is remembering my Dad as a family man. My Dad craved his family and always needed to be close, whether it be a simple gesture as to be able to pick up his granddaughters from school to spend an afternoon with them laughing and giggling, indulging in an everyday visit for ice cream only for them to always come home with a secret. Or where it was a giant family dinner or time spent together as a family, with our most cherished moments of a Christmas Eve. (That will never be the same without him). Growing up, I remember my Dad going out of his way to make the simplest of things special. Like Dad knocking at the door, hiding behind a fresh-cut Christmas tree and speaking in a small voice, "I'm Mr. Christmas Tree. Can I come in?" Or making sure he was front and center at a grandchild's choir concert, beaming with pride. (Then letting everyone there know how proud he was). My Dad had a great ability to celebrate you and all your triumphs, and he had an even better ability to catch you when you'd fall. My Dad gave the best advice. He was someone you could always run home to. Even when you didn't want to hear what you should be doing, he was always right in the end. You could even see a simple look if he approved or disapproved. After every talk we'd had about bad things happening, my Dad always said, "Rise above the mire, you're a Jamison and you come from great stock. And if all else fails, channel your inner Irene." And if anyone knows my grandmother, she got things DONE!

My Dad truly cared about and loved people. He enjoyed his employment at Valley View Health Care Center and developed relationships with the residents and staff. He was a man who saw everybody or who they truly were.

My Dad had an amazing sense of humor. He never missed an opportunity to make someone laugh. I'm really going to miss seeing him do doughnuts in his little care in the middle of a packed grocery aisle. I'm going to miss seeing the hundreds of pictures in which my Dad chose to photobomb. He was really a child at heart. His humor rubbed off on all who were around him. No one was upset around Dad for too long.

My Dad has now left us kids with a unique set of skills we will use the rest of our lives. For instance, how to make the perfect glass of chocolate milk and stir the heck out of it without breaking the glass (which he's done more than once). How to "properly" decorate the Christmas tree (stand back and forth, squinting,  checking for holes), only to rearrange every ornament after we'd gone to bed (Sorry to my girls that is a very real skill that I've taken to heart). Dad showed us how to truly love and care about every living thing. To reach out to those in need of a friend, a smile, or a hug, companionship and love. Dad showed us craftsmanship, taking pride in things we worked with. As well as taking pride in who we are and how we conducted ourselves around others. He taught us how to be adventurous, with my brothers sharing a common interest in artifacts, from Indians to gemstones and a love of exploring and the thrill of discovery. He really knew how to "rough it". He taught us to see the beauty in EVERYTHING, even an old hornet's nest. My Dad taught of style and class, as he would say "I'm always dressed to impress", then he'd twist his mustache. He always told us to remember who we are and where we come from and to take pride in that heritage.

I'll close with the words of meg Conely: Now what? What about today as I say goodbye? After all the hugs and embraces from family and friends, after I am finally alone to breathe and gather my thoughts. I'll sit and remember my father absent from distraction and dismay, and I know what I will find. There's a daddy whose body has been taken, but whose heart is near. There is love and the blessing of time given and time taken. There are hope and faith. There is the brush of something greater than you and me, something that carries the smell of stars and the impression of truths straight and gleaming and multi-dimensional. And there in that quiet space is the assurance of a Father's voice, rocking back and forth against my heart, saying "Don't worry, Sweetheart. I am right here. You can do this."

Dad, your love, your patience, your understanding, your wisdom and your amazing sense of humor will live on inside of us forever. You have given us gifts that are more precious than anything in this world. You've loved us from the time you met us, but we have loved you our whole lives. It's not goodbye, but I'll see you later!

Ruthie Jamison Brady

Dec 2018

A brief look into Larry's last days

As I was organizing my e-mail files recently, I re-read letters that I'd written to my employer in the weeks prior to Larry's November 13, 2018 death. They offer a glimpse into my daily life as Larry's declining health required me to adopt a revised daily schedule. I share them here:

Wednesday, October 3:
(Addressed to a co-worker at the place of my employment). ....Larry had gotten dressed and got his oxygen on and was near the door to leave, to go ANYWHERE. But he was standing still, leaning against the wall, too tired to move! I talked him into staying home so he's been in his recliner sleeping since I got home. 

He CAN'T be driving when he can't stay awake. It's scary to leave him on his own. In Sept 2017 Larry's lungs were working at 94% capacity. In August 2018 the number was down to 59%. Currently, the number is at 42%. That's quite a drop in the last 7 weeks. I did the math. If the decline continues at the rate it has the last few weeks, that doesn't leave many weeks of lung functioning. It's a wake-up call for sure!

Thursday, November 1: (Addressed to my "boss" at work). What a busy day I've had, after a busy night! Two of Larry's daughters and one son are here for the day, just spending time with each other and their dad. I came to realize something this morning as I was helping Larry get up and dressed and ready for the day. I've been helping him (for hours) through the night, getting him back to bed about 6:30 am, then I get ready for work and get to the office sometime after 7 am. He was really struggling this morning after he took his pills at 6 am and I helped him with everything...walking room to room, taking pills, drinking water, and eventually getting dressed. That turned out to be a 2-hour process. His oxygen would plummet to 64, 68 or 71 repeatedly, so I had to keep him quiet, trying to breathe and get it up into the 90s. I realized I can't go off and leave him ALONE anymore at 7 am, or 8 am, while he sleeps for a final hour or so. His friend Gary has been coming over about 9 am after he takes his grandson to school and then he helps Larry get ready to get out of the house. But I had my eyes opened again this morning to another required change. I really need to stay here, get myself ready 6:30-7:30 am (however it works out) while he tries to rest a final hour or so. Then I need to get him up about 8 am and dressed and stay with him until Gary comes. Everything is in slow motion due to the inability to breathe. I'm really seeing that I need to stay with Larry in the mornings until Gary gets here and can monitor him. I don't feel comfortable or feel like it's responsible to leave him here alone when I go to work. Will it work for you and the Church if I come in when I get all that taken care of each morning? It may be about 9:30 am. We'll see how it goes. I know I can still get my workload done and on time, with a few adjustments in the timing. I just see such a decline by the week. My son has been coming over for dinner each Monday evening and he expressed the same observation to Larry's oldest daughter Becky this week. Larry's youngest son Matthew took off work today and is spending the day here (and overnight) with his dad and oldest sister. Larry really wanted to get out and about today with his kids, but I wouldn't let him. He's nowhere near in shape to do that. The desire and the reality don't match! When he's on continuous oxygen and his oxygen reading goes to 64 after he walks from one room to another, he's not in any condition to leave the house. I'm taking it a day at a time and doing what I need to do to keep him safe physically and boosted mentally and emotionally. Keep him in your prayers and pray that the Sciatic pain I've been having for 6 weeks will subside so I can manage all this efficiently and pain-free! 

Left to Right: Larry's oldest daughter Becky Newman, youngest son Matt Jamison and youngest daughter Ruthie Brady, in our home to visit their Dad. 

In the evening of November 1, Matt and Rachael Jamison entertained us all, with their dad's help, with a family slide show. It was well-timed, as Larry was able to identify family members who were unknown to the rest of us. 

Saturday, November 3: (Again a message to my employer, The Rev. Mark D. Meyer of Christ Episcopal Church in Canon City): Mark, I need to update my previous email to you about Jamie (Larry's nickname) and my schedule. He hasn't been out of the house for 3 days, as he's just not able. We're seeing the decline BY THE DAY. He's now wearing a mask to distribute the oxygen to both his mouth and nose.

Ruthie Brady is enjoying her dad's company.

It's been helpful, as the reading at rest goes up to 97 or 98 with the mask on, while on the home concentrator. However, we're finding that ANY activity, motion, or movement, brings it down. He walked into another room this morning and it went to 72. Early this morning he walked from the bathroom to the bedroom (with my help) and it went to 61. It took 3 hours for it to come up sufficiently for me to get him dressed. So now, of course, that presents its own challenge for eating, drinking water, taking pills, etc. I'm helping him with every single motion. This week his daughter from Oregon was here and gave me help and yesterday his son joined us and helped. Everyone's gone now. They both concurred with my assessment that I need to be here as much as possible, at least for the next couple of weeks while we see how this goes. I've arranged with his two local daughters to come over and stay with Jamie while I run to the office to print or catch up with what HAS TO BE DONE there. Otherwise, it would help immensely if I could work from home, preparing reports, bulletins, bookkeeping etc. 
Jamie also finally says you can inform anyone who needs to be aware of the reason for my revised schedule, while using discretion and speaking in generalities, of course. I don't believe he's in his last few days, but he's certainly going downhill daily. He's frail, worn out, weak, out of breath, and relatively quiet. I have to hold him solidly when he takes every step. And everything is in SLOW MOTION, due to the limited breathing. 

While sitting on the heating pad for the Sciatic pain,
I'm visiting with my granddaughter Makenna.

And yes, I'm taking Ibuprofen for the Sciatica. I sit on the heating pad whenever I'm seated. But the pain is constant and very strong. The company this week was nice and helpful and necessary, but you know how it goes with company. Demanding and tiring! Thank you for understanding. I will continue to do my best to take care of everyone and get my work done efficiently. 

Sunday, November 4: (In a letter addressed to the chairman of a committee for which I take meeting Minutes): John, I won't be at the meeting Wednesday morning as I need to take my husband to a 9:00 am doctor appointment. I've let Mark know and received his blessing, support, and understanding. I truly need to be more flexible with my hours in the office. I'll get my work done but some may be done from home, or at odd hours. My husband's health is rapidly declining and it's gotten to the place where I must help him with every little activity: walking, moving, dressing, in and out of chairs/bed, etc. He has Severe Pulmonary Fibrosis and Severe Pulmonary Hypertension. He has great difficulty breathing and is on oxygen 24/7, now using a mask to emit oxygen into his mouth as well as his nose. He's very frail, weak, tired, and of course out of breath. He's pretty much house-bound, except for necessary trips to the doctor. A friend is able to relieve me occasionally so I can run to the office/bank/store, etc. Two of his kids are going to relieve me as they're able. When possible, I'll leave Larry home alone to rest while I'm working at the Church office. I will need to assess the viability of that on a daily basis. Of course, I'll do my best to do all my work, timely and efficiently, I appreciate your support and understanding. 

Our living room was re-arranged to accommodate Larry's hospital bed.

Saturday, November 10, in a letter to my boss: Just a quick note from the "Jamison Care Center". We got Jamie enrolled with Sangre de Cristo Hospice yesterday. Very, very long day. But excellent choice. So our living room has turned into his bedroom. At least he's still home and his care is manageable. More out of state company is arriving in the next few days. And they will all help and he'll be happy to see them. So we're doing ok. 

Larry's niece and husband, Sara and Quinn Lister enjoyed a visit with Larry Nov 9-10. 

Larry's sister-in-law Linda Jamison arrived from Utah for a visit Nov 10-14.
She's enjoying the company of Matt and Lisa Jamison and our granddaughter Makenna. 

 

Larry was still entertaining his company with stories on
 Sunday, Nov. 11, two days before his passing. 

Larry passed away in the early morning hours Tuesday, November 13, 2018. 

Larry's Family Reunites July 2019

After my husband Larry Jamison passed away last November, I knew the day would come when his children would want to own some of his personal items as keepsakes. Larry was a "collector" and his collections were well known to his 6 children. I've posted previously, showcasing many of his "collections". So I told his children "You don't have to wait until I die to get possession of some of the things you want that belonged to your dad!" Too often when a step-parent survives a parent, the children are "shut out" and don't inherit things that I believe are rightfully theirs.   

I got busy in the 3 months following Larry's death and cleaned out storage totes, drawers, closets, cabinets, and trunks. I sorted the items I wanted to keep and those that would be available to Larry's descendants and first wife. My youngest step-daughter scheduled a reunion for July 14-20 and we got busy finalizing plans. 

Here's the proof of our recent reunion.

 5 of our families enjoyed July 14 at the Renaissance Festival in Larkspur, CO.

This sunroom spans the front of my house. 

My kids put tables up the length of the room on which we  could display the items that were available to them. 

Daughters Becky, Rachael, and Ruthie took great care in displaying the items that had been packed away for so many years. Doing this gave them a couple of hours during which they could reminisce about the history of the item and its connection to their childhood!

On Thursday afternoon, the family gathered at my house to choose their treasures. They also received a few items they hadn't anticipated. 

The picture below shows a tote full of old family Bibles that dated back to 1852 that were distributed among the 6 children. Yes, a few tears were shed at this point. (And no, they won't be permanently stored in the plastic bags.)

By the end of the afternoon, it was time for a barbecue. I'm grateful to my son Matt Klein and son-in-law Dave Newman for manning the grill.

Fun with family on the patio.

I can speak for the rest of my family in saying we were very grateful that most of our family was able to gather this week to honor Larry C. Jamison, to enjoy each other's company, and make more memories that we can talk about at our future reunions!